Dr Jack: Just smile. Don’t let them irritate you. Smile, breathe, repeat…
I want to live as stress free as possible, because I know that lately, I just seem to have way too much of it and it really is hindering my quest to be as healthy as I possibly can. It’s slowing my weight loss and just aggravating everything. It interrupts my sleep, and it drains. Ughhhhhhhh….
Sadly, I think that I add in way too much of it myself, so becoming conscious of that has been important. Why do I care what anyone else thinks? Why do I let what they think of me get to me? Why does their stress become my stress? And who do I really hurt in the process?
Like all people I have some amount of stress that I can’t avoid. We all have it. Those stresses, I just keep trying to have a good plan and deal with.
I teach middle school and that brings in some amount, but interestingly, not tons from the students. There are definitely times when working with the kids can be stressful, but if I was looking at where the majority of my school stress comes from, it’s adults. Too much pressure….wayyyyyyy too much pressure and I often let it get under my skin.
Its hard not to! I have a great work ethic instilled in me by my parents. Do your best, no matter what you are doing, do your best. But sometimes despite your best effort, people criticize. And unfortunately I always seem to take that to heart. I feel like they are saying I needed to do more. Despite knowing I am giving 110% effort, I start thinking I should do better. There is only so much of me to go around. And I am quick to steal from myself to give to others. But who pays for that!
I also have a terrible tendency to try to fix what I know is impossible to change. I could give ten examples from this week alone. A friend posted a saying on my Facebook yesterday, “One of the happiest moments in life is when you find the courage to let go of what you cannot change.” I probably should put that on my bedroom mirror and read it several times a day. Embroider it on a pillow, carry it on paper in my pocket. I am awful about that. I want to fix everything. And accepting that I can’t isn’t easy for me.
I could go on here forever….. but what’s more important than anything isn’t the stress but what am I doing about it.
I am working on a few things, changes in how I approach these stress filled situations and people who want to dump their stress on me.
1. Accept that your best is enough. Period. I work hard. I do my best no matter what the task. That’s enough.
2. Their stress belongs to them. I am not taking on theirs.
3. Keep Chris in her happy place! I like my world of sunshine, flowers and rainbows. Stay there more.
4. Make time for relaxation. I schedule everything else! Schedule some fun!
5. Color more! And no not those adult books of tiny stress filled spaces! But big wide open pages with room for freedom! Read a book, draw, watch tv…I never watch tv. Play! Make something fun. Knit more. Just relax.
6. Shake… literally! A technique taught to me by Nancy, my Pilates teacher, where I start shaking my head and move to every part down to my big toe. Shake off the junk that others are attempting to put on me.
7. Sing, play music, dance, walk….anything physical.
8. Ultimately, I need to ask myself, how am I taking care of Chris in this situation, a technique taught to me by Rob, my life coach.
9. Accept what you cannot change and stop spending valuable energy on it.
10. Smile! Breatheeeeeee….. smile! Breatheeeee…… that really does work! The most important part? Repeat. Thanks Dr. Jack!