New Year’s Eve is fast approaching. The time when everyone reviews the year they had and talks about goals for the future. And as I scroll through my Facebook, I see all kinds of things. Some people bless the year they had and look forward to new things. Others curse the year, and hope next year is different. Some people seem to never be happy no matter if good comes their way or not.
I could allow myself to fall into the trap that 2017 was the worst year of my life, which in many ways it was, but I won’t do it….. Nope. … no way…..
I decided to look at it differently! I have a lot of excuses to look back at the year and think how awful it was…. I really do. But the truth is, 2017 proved to me just how tough I really am. And I mean tough. Like wow! How did I make it through? Easy! I had Dr. Jack, and Rob. I had my family and my dear friends. And I had the sheer will to get up every day.
No matter what life threw at me, I still got up and showed up for my family, my friends, the students I teach and people who count on me. I still showed up and I am proud of that. I can’t say I was at my best, and I can’t say I am not bruised and beat up, but despite it all? Still standing! Still got up and showed up!
My healthy self suffered, my emotional self took a beating, but it too? Still standing! I have some work to do in 2018. A lot of work actually, but I can’t look back and wish the last year never happened. I would have missed out on so much. And despite the bad, I choose to be grateful for the time I had with the people I lost. I am so grateful I asked Shannon to live with us and she said yes. I am sooooooo grateful for all the fun we had, and how close we got. I have beautiful memories of her that I carry in my heart. I got to be there when Russ Jr, came into this world and glad to be with him until he left it. Glad I got to hold him and tell him I loved him, to memorize his face.
Experiences in life, be they good or bad, teach us just how much we can handle. And even at those moments I thought my heart would physically break? I still managed to stand up and show up for my family.
I used to think of myself as a pretty weak person, with a heart way too big and too many emotions all the time, and in some things I wish I had done better with soooo many things. But ….. I choose to look back and think that I did okay. Not my absolute best, but the best I could in the situation I was in.
I have a lot of friendships here, some people I know by face and some only across the Internet. So many of you have shared things with me in confidence, you know who you are… and I just want you to know I am proud of you too! Because no matter what 2017 dished out? YOU are still standing, too. Many of you had some really hard things, things and you are still dealing with many, I keep you on my prayer list. 2017 did not break us! It proved what we are made of!
2018? I am hoping it is the best year of my life! Hoping I can achieve all the goals I have made for myself. I look forward to the birth of my granddaughter, Rachael Christine Eddy, I know right? Quite an honor I have been given, due May 2018. And I hope that this coming year is the healthiest year of my entire life as I pull all the pieces back into place. I intend to put my best work into it.
Hope 2018 is your best year, too!
Hugs
Chris